Obama delivered the commencement speech at Morehouse College this year. In that speech, he mentioned that no one really cares about how you have had it rough (paraphrasing). This is a very true statement. People don’t and won’t care.
I used to take the fact that people’s lack of understanding for my life experience very personal. It really pissed me off that people could not “feel my pain”. I felt that people were just entertaining me because they felt some type of duty versus having a true since of compassion and empathy. As life progressed, I learned that everyone is not meant to walk in my shoes. They would not be MY shoes if everyone could wear them. I came to realize that my struggle was unique to me and it developed me in a way that I could serve others. I went from taking it personal that people could not feel my pain to a person who appreciated what God allowed me to walk through.
That same struggle I used to disdain I began to own. I became proud of what I have survived. God showed me that through my struggle I was refined into a woman that is compassionate, empathetic and wise. My struggle birthed my gift to serve other people. Because I experienced so much at an early age, I can relate to a large scope of people. I understand survival; I understand self actualization. I have experiences that I can share with someone in their time of need. Everyone can’t say that. Everyone isn’t me. My struggle has made me a valuable catalyst in God’s Kingdom.
Please realize that everything that happens to you is for your growth and someone else’s growth. Your life is not your own. You are chosen to give, serve and share. Just because people, including your friends may not be as compassionate regarding your struggle does not make that experience any less valuable. When you own and use that experience to elevate yourself and someone who crosses your path you instantly stop being the victim and you become not only a victor, but a foot soldier for others who are trying to make it through their personal hell.
As a person has survived financial, emotional and/or physical trauma, you have WON. You are blessed and valuable. People may not care about your struggle, but you should want to OWN your struggle because it is your refining process that makes you who you are: GREAT.