And this Happened 

So, you know it is a story behind this.  Let’s get into it.

I’ve been natural since 2006 and this is my third big chop.   There is a stereotype that when women are “going through” they cut their hair.  As applied to me, the stereotype is true.

I look at my life like three intersecting spheres: career, relationships and health.   My career isn’t going the way I thought it would.  You already know about the relationship portion because I am always whining about it.

And………I am currently THE biggest I have ever been in my life.

In January I decided that I was going to use exercise as away to stay focused through my storm.  It has worked.  I have lost at least 10 pounds of fat and gained muscle.  I say at least 10 pounds because I honestly don’t know where I began in my weight.  But I am running three miles again, weight lifting and I changed my diet.  Excercising has been instrumental in keeping me sane and leveled.

I feel in my spirit that my breakthrough is coming.  My hair for me represented a time of immense struggle.  Walking into my breakthrough I needed a new look.  I needed new hair.  At first I cut off two to three inches.   I hated the length since I was used to having it long.   I initially was going wait until I reached my goal weight,  but after I cut it I decided to let it all go.

On Saturday, I went to the barber.  I didn’t like what I saw when the barber cut it, but since I am pretty saavy with hair shears I was able to get what I wanted.  Once I finished, I jumped up and down because I LOVED my new hair.   All face—including acne marks.  But it was a face that was…..pretty.  I saw past the flaws and saw my eyes. My cheeks. My smile.  My forehead.  I liked what I saw.  Nothing was hidden.

Now without all the hair I can really focus on my workouts ( the sweat dries my hair bad).  I can focus more on having a “look”.  Your eye lashes really pop when when your face is the focus.  I feel like am getting ready so when the breakthrough comes I can walk into it with ease.

It is  freedom in change.

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